Or do you just want food? Matthew 15:29-39
Not many educated people would deny the birth and life of Jesus Christ. History shows clearly He existed around 2000 years ago and was indeed killed.
His actions made a huge impact on His society and to those around Him – especially the miracles He performed.
His fame spread far and wide – people travelled for miles to come and get the healing they could not find anywhere else. And He healed them *all*.
Here and now, today, it’s so easy to get discouraged when we don’t get the healing we want or need. But do we approach Jesus the same way the people who got healed did?
Reading this morning one of the most well known miracles – where Jesus feeds 4000 people from a small amount of bread & fish. An amazing event that gathered much community attention.
But the thing that stood out to me this morning was the hunger of these people. And not their physical hunger for food – their internal hunger. They were not focussed on their hunger or the solution. They had a deeper hunger that directed them to forgo their physical hunger for food.
They had put aside their appetite, their physical desires, for something of far deeper value. In fact, they had abandoned their very lives for 3 days to be with Jesus and hear His truth.
“I feel sorry for these people. They have been here with me for three days, and they have nothing left to eat. I don’t want to send them away hungry, or they will faint along the way.” – Jesus
Amazing the depths of love & concern that Jesus has for His people. But also revealing is the attitude these people had. They were going to stay with Jesus for a 4th day without food. He had to send them away – they were going to stay.
Do we approach Jesus with the same devotion, expectation or desperation? Or is He just a backstop to our preferred way of avoiding the reality of our current predicament? Are we distracted by the ‘solutions’ / gimmicks that do not address the heart of our issues? Or are we focussed on the ‘solution’ to our physical hunger? Where is our trust, attention and effort?
Is Jesus just the backstop to our preferred way of avoiding the reality of our current predicament / pain?
I can honestly say from my own experience that every time I have gone to Jesus with real resolve about a need or ailment, He has delivered. Not that anything we ‘do’ can summon up extra power, but it seems that only in our deep desire or desperation do we actually experience His miraculous work in our lives.
Everything Jesus does is at a heart level – He doesn’t ask for, condone or honour lip service. Far from it – He actually *hates* it.
Jesus would rather you reject Him openly than only give mental assent. So should we be surprised that we are not aware of many things until we have given up on other things and put our trust in Him and Him alone?
He wants our undivided attention and loyalty.
Jeremiah 29:13 comes to mind:
If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. (NLT)
Even our ‘finding’ of Jesus requires a ‘wholehearted’ approach. It reminds me of a few times in my life where I ‘looked for God’. I thought I was at rock bottom – I was very depressed, angry and in desperation.
On at least 2 occasions I picked up an old Bible and said ‘ok god, if you’re there what do you have for me’. I flicked open and read:
“Bastards shall not enter the house of the Lord”
I fit that definition both by birth and actions. Born illegitimately, I grew up in shame, with a very identity. Many decisions along the way led me to be very self reliant, ruthless and selfish. I knew I was a mongrel to others deep down – every action was for a purpose – for my own good.
I remember at least once literally throwing that old religious book across the room. When I look back I find it amazing that I actually had a Bible from somewhere. Growing up in a cult I had come to hate the Bible, the notion of ‘god’ and religious people, well, christians at least. My hatred would cause me to quite aggressive and abusive at times – so much so it would surprise and even scare me.
It was a year or so later that I was truly desperate. On a trip to end my life, I opened another Bible but this time, my heart was different. My ‘prayer’ was something like:
“God I don’t think you’re there, and if you are I think you’re a &^%#&^#%. #*&^*&^# but if you can do something with my life it’s yours. I have messed it up”
This time when I opened the Bible, I couldn’t put it down. For hours. It was like God was talking to me. The depth, the wisdom, the challenge that He gave me I will never forget. It started a 10 hour reading session that day. And the next – in fact it lasted months.
Questions I never verbalised were answered. Underlying heart motives were exposed. Philosophies challenged. Wrong actions addressed. It was powerful and life-changing.
Could I have summoned up this ‘desire’ or whole-hearted approach? No, it was the natural result of God allowing me to suffer the consequences of my actions. The sin I loved so much was leading me to my death – spiritually, emotionally and finally physically. In my stubbornness I refused to look elsewhere until I was literally unable to cope.
For they hated knowledge
and chose not to fear the Lord.
They rejected my advice
and paid no attention when I corrected them.
Therefore, they must eat the bitter fruit of living their own way,
choking on their own schemes.
Proverbs 1:29-31 (NLT)
In His love, He brought me to my knees, gave me the idea and desire to ‘search’ for Him and opened my eyes bit by bit to His truth.
For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death.
2 Corinthians 7:10 (NLT)
The changes over those few months were stark. From chronic drug and alcohol abuse to being clean from everything, stealing and ripping people off to the inner desire to help people. Being a hater of a god who I didn’t believed existed to someone who had a deep desire to know God more and more.
19 years later this small piece of history in the Bible is still so relevant – not just as something I experienced once, but a reality for here and now – today.
I have areas where I need Him to help or need His change. Financially, physically and emotionally there are things that, without Him, are too much for me.
Am I approaching God with that same hunger, desire or desperation? Or is it me trying harder in my own strength with Jesus as a ‘bit on the side’?
Are some of these events or things being allowed due to my sin? Are they the ways God is having to use to get my attention to say “Adam where is your hunger, where is your desire? Adam come back!”
He is calling. I’m getting hungry. I must go.
Conclusion: Jesus feeds the hungry!
PRAYER: Lord, develop in me a desperation that only You can meet. Please let me turn to You with this attitude sooner rather than later. Sorry for the ways that I trust myself and deny You. Help me open my heart to You and relax in the care that only You can give. Thank you for Your deep and unending love that does what is best despite my rebellion and complaining. Have Your way.
NOTES: I