Recently I read a little about a case in America where 13 children were supposedly abused and kept locked up in a suburban house. The story, as portrayed, was horrific and hard to read, let alone imagine through one of the children’s eyes…
I think there is much more to the story than has been reported – and the presented story has quite obvious flaw and inconsistencies*… (possibly to champion the public call for a ban on homeschooling or further deride Christianity). However, this is not the focus or object of this article.
I do have to say first though, that if the abuses reported are accurate, they have not been perpetrated by Christians as reported in the media. God has a very high value and recognition of children – definitely not one that condones abuse or neglect. Any claim to the contrary is a blatant lie or attempt to deceive.
The main grip occurred after reading one of the news reports from someone who attended a kindergarten with one of the children. They recounted that one of the children attended and was always in the same clothes and smelt bad. They recalled how the other children would mock them.
It would be years later that people would realise that she was not fed, had only one set of clothes, was chained to a bed and forced to sit in her own faeces (according to reports). For me, this evoked powerful emotions – and unfortunately, bad memories.
Sure, I remember times where other children laughed and me and mocked me – I was put into an English state school as an ‘always isolated in a cult’ Aussie kid. I know about how hard it can be when you don’t have money or the clothes or the accent of everyone else. I remember that, after 5 years of learning to speak in a pommy accent and be ‘popular’ in an English environment, to then be put into a Christian school in Australia and get a different type of ‘shunnning’.
But none of that was what came to mind when I thought about the thoughts and emotions of this poor child. The things that come to mind were the time I had been mean, vile and full of hatred to others. So deep was my desire to be loved, accepted and ‘popular’ that at times I was violent.
One particular boy came strongly to mind – we’ll call him Spencer. His breath was terrible and he stank. He was wildly unpopular and at times I joined in bullying him. I recall once he was caught red handed stealing form a teacher and the police were called. I thought it was funny to call him names and rugby tackle him as everyone else piled on.
I weep now as I think how my actions may have affected this poor boy. I think of how, despite being so unpopular and hated by so many in the school, he had a strength about him that was admirable. He still tried to fit in, to be funny, to learn and to survive. As far as I am aware, he was still there when I left o come back to Australia.
It is only now that I remember him and think, ‘wow maybe he was smelly and stole things because…’ Well the hypotheticals are endless. But one thing is for sure – despite the fact I wanted to have a lot of things we couldn’t afford – he likely wasn’t stealing for the fickle things I desired. Maybe his family had no food, maybe they didn’t have hot running water – a reality that never crossed my mind at the time.
It is a powerful reminder and the inspiration for our Jesus time this morning, to always look out for other people’s needs. We did a fun activity on attentiveness as an illustration:
How much do we notice?
Game: Put a wide selection of items on the kitchen table.
Tell the children to go out and add or remove something.
Ask them to come back & see how many things they get.
I did this about 10 times, and each time I changed things on the table, but also moved stuff around the room, put the TV on it’s side, put chairs upside down, changed my clothes – you get the idea.
They didn’t notice ANYTHING other than what was on the table.
I encouraged them that it was good to be looking at the table and remembering – but that God often wants us to look at other things that what the crowd is doing – other things than what we are presented with and always other people.
There are always other people and if we are attentive to God and others, He will use us in their lives to build them up. Help them live and grow, not put them down.
To look at the possible position of others before judging, or worse, attacking them. It can be soul destroying to those already struggling to survive. Putting extra weight on those, when God calls us to carry their burdens.
Truth is, the world is full of ‘Spencers’ – though many do not smell, or have visible signs of hardship. But when you take the time to look, ask and listen, you often hear incredible tales of pain and sadness – and I for one can relate.
When I am with those who are weak, I share their weakness, for I want to bring the weak to Christ. Yes, I try to find common ground with everyone, doing everything I can to save some.
1 Corinthians 9:22
He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.
2 Corinthians 1:4
Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.
You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.
Though he was God,
he did not think of equality with God
as something to cling to.
Instead, he gave up his divine privileges;
he took the humble position of a slave
and was born as a human being.
When he appeared in human form,
he humbled himself in obedience to God
and died a criminal’s death on a cross.
Philippians 2:3-8
If you are someone who has struggled – or been victim to other mean people – please know that you are special. Their actions, while they did affect you, do not reflect on you. Their actions only show how wounded and weak they are – having to have to treat others badly to feel good about themselves. I am sorry for my actions and hope you can realise there is a God who would love to carry your burdens…seriously, His Son was punished and killed so you can be free completely!
Give your burdens to the Lord,
and he will take care of you.
Psalms 55:22
If you need help or are suicidal, please talk to someone, call a hotline – a friend – anyone, right now. Death is final and you have more worth than you know. You are loved and special!
Lifeline: 131114 24 hours.
Lifelink: 08 9381 5555 / Free Country 1800 198 313 24 hours.
http://www.suicide.org/hotlines/international/australia-suicide-hotlines.html
Conclusion: We all need to get our love and identity from God, pay attention to others, then reflect that love to them.
PRAYER: Lord, I pray for ‘Spencer’ that, despite the years you do (and would have) given Him strength and love when everyone else failed him. And I pray that we would have the desire and heart to see all the other ‘Spencers’ out there – in every day life. That we wouldn’t compete with them, ignore them or criticise them, but that we would uplift and encourage and support and love them. Lord, please forgive us for the wrongs we have done and the hurt we have caused.
NOTES: * for example reports state that the children can’t read or write, however the journal kept by the children is quoted
Tags: Jesus Time, Tall Poppy,