Since Christmas, we have set up and rammed a new front fence: it’s not finished, but feels great to have *finally* made some progress on it!
I have to say, that despite the pain and severe physical limitation, I *love* working with this amazing family.
We had some friends come to help – and watching our kids continually take the time to stop, include and teach others is so rewarding. To me, it is part of what discipleship looks like, a command from our Master, so desperately needed and severely lacking.
It is one of the aspects of my Christian walk and parenting that I have found incredibly challenging. I have sought out people to lead, teach, walk with and disciple me – yet very little has resulted long term (likely an indication of how stubborn or erratic I am).
As a husband and father of 6, I believe that these are my most important disciples, though again have found myself severely lacking. Despite that, I have sacrificed, asked for God’s help and tried to lead these amazing humans to the God that enabled me to stick around.
Over the last 20 years, I have been absolutely blown away at how God has led us, changed us, taught us, encouraged us, directed us, protected us, provided for us and even used us in other people’s lives.
It doesn’t look anything like I would have planned which would have been so much more structured, more people, set teaching topics, learning outcomes, tests and certificates and … well you get the idea!
But instead, as I have *slowly* learnt (and at times been forced!) to give up my own life, agenda, goals, plans etc and be intentional in:
1) knowing Jesus (reading scripture, prayer, communing with Him) ^1
2) learning God’s ways
3) dealing with my own issues (did I mention I have a *lot*!?)
4) spending time with my wife and children, listening to them – really listening
5) sharing my faults, failures and weaknesses with them
6) encouraging them, giving them the freedom to fail and setting clear standards of requirement
7) saying sorry. A *LOT*!
I have seen much change – first of all in me, but afterwards, also in them and finally in family relationships.
I say all that to encourage you, brother or sister in Christ: God can use you to build His Church with the most valuable disciples: your wife and children!!
Even if things have gone so badly that you have given up: get back in the ring! Not to fight or force them, but to admit your faults, listen to their hurts and hearts. To get alongside them, and show them that you love them enough to lead them – even if that means you are going to make mistakes.
With leadership comes the possibility of error which can hurt, but the potential for change is huge. Go for it! It will be difficult – you will make mistakes – at times you may even regret it…but the results will be incredibly rewarding.
But more than that just a reward for yourself – it will be a huge benefit for those who God has placed in your sphere. He knows what He is doing and is so powerful He can use you and even your mistakes, for eternal outcomes.
What have you got to loose – only good can come from your effort!
So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless.
1 Corinthians 15:58 (NLT)
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Romans 8:28 (NLT)
Lord, help us to model You to our spouses and children. May it be You who guides us and empowers us. Please, deal with us – give us the desire and power to come to You so You can change us into the people You want us to be. Use us to lead our wives and children in Your ways so they would know You and follow you. Have Your way.
[NOTES]
^1 Knowing Jesus is THE key to everything I say. Without Him, not only are you doomed for eternity, but your own ‘wisdom’ will be foolishness, your best ideas will yield worthless results.
May you always be filled with the fruit of your salvation—the righteous character produced in your life by Jesus Christ—for this will bring much glory and praise to God.
Philippians 1:11 (NLT)
Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.
Colossians 3:10 (NLT)
So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image.
2 Corinthians 3:18 (NLT)