Today, we were Invited to a BBQ, bonfire & concert of someone I had never heard of at short notice.
We didn’t know what to expect, but it was our weekly ‘family fun’ day so the resulting vote was to go along. My wife and I with 6 children and my niece arrived to a flashing arrow directing cars and large ETERNITY sign on the gate. This humble entrance was hiding something…
The event was much bigger than we expected! We could soon see the huge bonfire – and by huge I mean huge…
People were gathering in a field next to the bonfire and many children were climbing up a very big mulch pile and playing off to the side.
Large logs were positioned towards a trailer at the front that had a fold down stage with lighting and sound.
A video was playing, presumably of Steve Grace and His journey around Australia, while we talked and met people we knew. After a while Paul Morrison started to play a couple of songs, and introducing the fact that Jesus was someone who could be trusted and then introduced this Steve Grace.
As he started to play it was evident that it wasn’t the sort of music I enjoy – country (disclaimer I THINK it’s country I am not a music person so wouldn’t have a clue really!).
But some of the songs started to hit a chord. They were taking about Jesus being the one we could trust, and how He could change lives and forgive.
In between the songs Steve would say a few things – one of which was about how Australians love to help each other. He then sang a song about some remote places in Australia.
It started to remind me of when I first got saved while travelling through W.A. As a drug addicted alcoholic who was ready to die (despite loving ‘life’ while drunk or high) I had decided to sell everything and go on a trip and end my life. The physical pain of a back injury, drug addiction, failed relationships and depression had got the better of me – I just wanted it to be over. But I wanted to chill first. It was 1999.
Without going into thousands of co-incidences and miracles that led to this point, I found myself stranded in a dry river bed 100km out of Newman (a small town a long way from Perth). The coaster bus motor home was bogged, the clutch was gone, my back was bad. The trees in this river bed had the marks of where the water flowed when it rained – and it was well over the roof of the bus. Was it rain season? I thought so but didn’t really know.
But besides that, I had very little fresh water and I was literally in the middle of nowhere. The track I was on was obviously seldom used (and likely never by any type of bus!). The river bed was about 40m wide at a guess, however there was a large lump in the middle. This meant I had to drive into the river bed, then down the river bed about 50m then across the bed, then back up the bed and then out and up the other side.
It looked possible – for a 4WD. But an over-loaded coaster bus? Never! But I had no option, the way I had gotten into this place was far worse and impossible to return. So I had to try…
As I drove into the river bed the bus immediately sank and got bogged – on the way DOWN! Going down into the river I was bogged and still had to go all the way along the bed, over the hump, back along the other side fo the bed and then up the other side which was quite steep. I could not start the bus & put it into gear as the clutch was gone. I had to try & start in gear. While bogged.
For those of you who are drivers you will know that this was a futile situation. But I was not a quitter. And yesterday, I had a glimmer of hope…
I had been lying on the bed in the bus reading the Bible. A book I had hated my entire life (due to the abusive actions of those who proclaimed it). But like I said many coincidences and miracles led me to this point. I was in agony – even more than usual.
I had drowned the quad in the river and had to pull it out & then work on it to fix it. I hadn’t drank alcohol in somewhere between 3 and 6 weeks on this trip and hadn’t had drugs either. There were drugs in the drawer but I really didn’t want to take them.
THIS IS IT
“This is it God. I don’t want you to heal me anymore I need you to. That cliff has my name on it”
Although looking back I can say that I thought I was at rock bottom many times in my life, this was it. The surroundings were perfect, the cliff made it easy. The pain was intense and I was stranded in this place (Eagle Rock falls) in a coaster bus. Everything I had was in this bus and I was resigned to this being my final destination.
But as I said that ‘prayer’ something very strange happened: the pain stopped. Completely. I have to explain: I was an acute and chronic sufferer. I was apparently in the top 1% of pain sufferers in Australia and so had been through a 6 week hospital course on pain and dealing with it. I had had an epidural done to give (what was promised as) 4 months of pain relief. That actually only lasted 4 hours.
I had access to morphine and suppository narcotics and I was on track for a morphine pump to be installed. Surgery was the only option – through the stomach with an oath and numero surgeon both giving me bleak diagnosis so I battled on. But the pain was constant 24/7.
Then here I am lying in this bed in the middle of nowhere after saying “God I need you to heal me” and the pain stops instantly. And my re-action? “I must just be in the right position on the bed”
I told you I was anti-God! I stayed still for nearly 17 hours thinking if I move I will be in agony again. But finally I gingerly started to move towards the edge of the bed to get up. Getting up was never easy or fun after lying down for more than 5 minutes…but today there was still no pain!
With a sudden burst of new enthusiasm, I started to rush around and get the bus ready to leave. I tried to fix the clutch, fix the quad and the rack and pack up. I set off but soon after found myself at this river crossing.
I started to dig each wheel out – then got the quad off the back. I positioned that at the back of the bus set it to push then ran and turned the start motor on the bus over. It would edge forward between 30cm to a metre at most each time. Then I would start again digging out, pushing.
In the rush between starting the quad and running to the bus to start it, I received a few injuries with left me bleeding. Trying again to fix the clutch added a coating of brake fluid. Add the sweat & dirt, long dredd locks and you get a bit of an image of what this scene was like.
I remember digging and trying for a few hours, maybe 2 before realising this was futile. I still wasn’t ready to give up, but I was starting to face reality. I remember saying something like ‘God if you are there – can you help?’.
Within seconds I could hear something – which turned out to be a car! Here?!
Sure enough a few minutes later a 4wd appeared and stopped. I don’t recall the conversation or what he looked like but this person stayed with me for hours using the snatch strap to lurch the bus 2m at a time before digging the bus and his 4wd out again and doing it all over again.
I am pretty sure this person appearing out of nowhere was the first time I started to think ‘maybe that was God’ instead of ‘that’s a coincidence’. There had been hundreds of these moments over the last few weeks. Many times I would have a question in my mind and open the Bible randomly & then there was the answer. I had never voiced the question, so found this incredible. So much so that I couldn’t put the Bible down.
Since this trip started I had found myself reading this book I had long hated for hours a day – sometimes 10 – enthralled , encouraged and challenged.
I remember clearly when I started on the trip, being at Wave rock… My underlying belief was that I was a victim in all the pain, problems in relationships, money, issues with the police etc. But I read the Bible and one verse in particular hit me like a knife.
“you are in this place because of your sin”
WHAT? MY sin? This verse was taken out of context and the person who says this statement later gets rebuked for saying – but for me in that place at that time it was a revelation. MY SIN, my choices actually did make a difference!
Lifting motors out of cars without a hoist or tackle, demo derbys, drugs, alcohol – maybe they did affect my back pain! Sounds crazy but this is the delusion I was living.
Dealing drugs, stealing cars, doing burnouts, driving like a total maniac – maybe, just maybe that is why the cops pull me over all the time, search my car and rock up with warrants? Maybe, just maybe IT WAS ME??? My sin. I had no idea what that meant.
Skipping many pivotal events, just before this day in the river bed I read a book that told me to list my sin and repent of it. Like what yer right every sin? Yes.
I immediately thought of things that I thought were sin: dealing drugs and stealing cars.
But as I started to write this list it became what I would consider smaller and smaller things. As I went through each one on that list a very, very strange thing happened to me. I cried.
To be more accurate, I broke.
“God I admit that I lied to this person, that I used this person, that I was mean to this person I am sorry please forgive me I turn from that sin”
As I read these seemingly small things I wept. I suddenly realised that these things were against God – who was actually real and there. I was wounding Him, I was throwing mud at Him – and yet He loved me anyway. He died for me anyway. He forgave me anyway.
They were not just tears of sorrow but of overwhelming disbelief and joy at the same time. HE LOVES ME! For someone whose dad left when they were born and never really connected with people – never received love – this was huge.
Despite my repressed and drug / alcohol affected (read severely affected!) memory, I recall this like it was 5 minutes ago.
I type this through tears as I think about it. And think about it often I do.
And here, in this field hearing these songs it reminds me yet again – the tears well up. My wife, kids, people I know are around. I fight them back but my heart feels like it could beat right through my chest.
I am loved! I am forgiven! People need to know this love!
A deep seated motivation of mine from this point in my life was to tell people about this Jesus who loves & forgives. To tell them that their issues – all of them – were due to sin and that Jesus was the remedy.
I had this idea and vision of travelling to country towns, putting on a show, concert, burnouts, anything and having people share about the love of Jesus. A semi-trailer with drop down stage, getting local Christians & churches involved, helping disciple the people afterwards. My heart is and always has been with the people in this incredible country.
And here in this field the vision and the experience are percolating again…
I then meet the person who owns the field & is holding the event – he described to a T what I had envisaged years ago. As I am processing this & thinking about the possibilities and opportunities in country towns – thinking of what it was like in Newman when I was first saved , Steve starts playing the song “how great thou art’.
As it does many more people are singing and getting into it – true worship. Suddenly it was my sort of music lol
As I worship I am also looking at a bearded guy who I have noticed a few times – obviously been drinking. He is at the front right near the stage dancing and trying to encourage others to do the same.
He is dancing with what seems to be his daughter and his partner – large glass of Bundy & coke in hand.
I am enthralled – he is singing at the top of his lungs to a God He seems to not know yet. It is evident that God is working on Him yet He likely doesn’t know it. It again reminds me of how I was. It is again an emotional and powerful reality.
As it turns out Steve Grace met this guy at a service station on the Nullarbor and started talking. They have been friends since and he was excited to be there to say the least!
Near the end of the event the owner of the field prayed over the crowd and this guys ending was ‘f@#k yer amen’ My heart leapt for joy and wept at the same time.
More of this!!! The interaction of a soul with His Creator. Rough, raw and real.
I had to meet this guy so followed him as he went to his car to fill up his drink. He was sold on Stave Grace – a ‘real genuine bloke who does good for the farmers’ – there were literally 4 swear words for every normal word.
He was very friendly and as I asked a few questions, he opened up quickly sharing about his childhood, relationships and jail time. I was sharing with him about the heart of a father that God the Father had given him and he responded about his earthly father.
Not that he had said anything about this yet- but I know there is a much deeper and darker side that this guy experiences every so often. I know what it is like to have those brief ‘moments of clarity’ despite the ‘fun’ and alcohol fuelled ‘fix’. This guy needs to know the love of the Father not just know about it!
As he was sharing about his religious beliefs (far from being Christian yet!) his friend came and started to summon him relentlessly to go back to the stage. As he finally gave in to her requests, I asked if he wanted to catch up another day and got his number. I will be contacting him soon – please pray for him – we will call him Dempsey
Please also pray for us as we think & pray about offering to be involved in some way in this ministry which we hold close to our hearts.
And please pray for Steve Grace as he ministers in this amazing country of ours to these amazing people who the Father loves and holds dear.
Conclusion: God loves and uses all things – He draws us way before we recognise!
So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless. 1 Corinthians 15:58 (NLT)
PRAYER: Lord, thankYou for Your great love. May we always respond to it and share it and about it with others. May it be our very fuel and goal. Empower and guide us as we endeavour to introduce people to the love and forgiveness that only You offer. Guide, provide & use Steve and anyone reading this who decides to step out for you. Be glorified in our weakness and service for You.
NOTES: I
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