When struggling through the valleys of life, take time to smell the weeds.
So blessed: after a particularly difficult night and morning, my amazing wife gently hugged me and began to pray. As she did, she wept: pouring her heart out to the Creator, her concern, love and empathy were tangible.
There was no flash from Heaven, the pain or spasms didn’t subside. But a new feeling competed for my attention, new thoughts to help drown out the pain: maybe I can get through this day after all…
I simply can not overstate the importance of finding a GODLY wife.
You may be willing to settle for *just* beauty or fun or success or companionship, but all these things are fleeting, fragile and futile. They all come to an *abrupt* end.
A Godly woman however? She will only gather momentum. If you settle for the former, in my eyes, you’re an idiot. Disagree? Fine, call me in 30 years! 😂
#ilovemywife
#thankYouJesus
An actual conversation this morning:
Wife: I’m going to die before you.
Me: That’s impossible.
Wife: Yep – God’s got a long fiery road for you.
Me: “”
Wife: Why are you crying?
My progression of thoughts:
I can’t handle the thought of another week let alone years. I can’t do it – every day is battle, I’m tired and just can’t do it.
But when she said that, I remember a prophecy someone once spoke over me that cut through me like a knife:
“Adam, I saw a pictured of you transposed over Jesus on the cross…
God is going to put you in the furnace until you feel like it is too much like you are too far gone. He is going to take you out of the furnace and cool you off. Then He is going to put you back in the furnace until you think it it is too late. Then He is going to take you out again and cool you offer. Over and over it went and something about being like Jacob, wrestling with God.
At the time, I didn’t know what to think. I just didn’t like the idea of it! My head was already reeling – it was the first time I had preached and I was not ready for the response (people confessing sins to the church).
But I would soon learn that to many, prophecy meant speaking words of encouragement and boosting people’s pride. But this was very, very different.
Out of the hundreds of prophecies I had spoken over me, it is the *one* that has come true… but I had FORGOTTEN!
21 years later, this morning, my wife words brought it flooding back. It also highlighted the fact that I had totally lost sight of what God is / has been doing in my life. Sure I know that He works all things together for the good of those He loves.
I have not lost the underlying theology that somehow what I am going through is what He knows is best for me. And although I have lost all hope that this trial will end this side of death, my hope for eternity remains secure – thanks to Him alone.
But in this moment I can see clearly that He, the loving Father, is simply holding me in this furnace until His work is done. And due to the clarity of this moment, I can see that I have not been submitting to Him fully. I have not been pressing in or relying on Him like I should. In fact, I have been holding Him at arms length, trying to cope with the pain moment by moment. Trying to keep going in my new severely limited capacity, simply trying to survive each day with as little pain relief as possible.
Where to from here?
Jesus only knows #Lordhelp